{"id":639,"date":"2023-12-21T08:54:44","date_gmt":"2023-12-21T13:54:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/claudiachan.co\/?p=639"},"modified":"2023-12-21T08:54:47","modified_gmt":"2023-12-21T13:54:47","slug":"critical-mom","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/evercraftleather.com\/claudiachan\/critical-mom\/","title":{"rendered":"Dealing with critical or demanding mothers\/in-laws"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Recently, I\u2019d been coaching a few people on dealing with their critical or demanding mothers (or in-laws).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>They are getting fed up and upset because all they wanted is for their moms to change. Wanting their moms to show them acceptance, understanding, love, appreciation\u2026.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here\u2019s what usually happens, their moms:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Always find ways to criticize them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Always tell them how they should do things.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Always question if they made the right decision.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Always ask them for more money, more help\u2026.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Never appreciate what they\u2019d done.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Never care about their feelings.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Never try to understand what\u2019s really going on in their lives.<br>\u200b<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>If you\u2019re dealing with the same thing, I understand how upset, frustrated and helpless you feel.\u00a0<\/strong>\u200b<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>And I also want to share this sad news with you:<\/strong>\u200b<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Your mom (or in-law) is NOT going to change.<\/strong>\u200b<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>It doesn\u2019t mean you can\u2019t do anything about it, but accepting this fact will help you move forward.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>It is important to grief for the loss and heal the pain.<\/strong>\u200b<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Grieving for the loss of the \u201cideal mom\u201d that you never have.\u00a0<\/strong>\u200b<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>And taking time to process the pain that they\u2019d caused you.\u00a0<\/strong>\u200b<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Then moving on to decide HOW YOU want to show up in the relationship.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You can still have a relationship with your mom. Maybe, it can be\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\ud83e\udd14I only visit twice a month for 2 hours each time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\ud83e\udd14I talk to my mom once a month on the phone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\ud83e\udd14I don\u2019t talk to her at all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And when she acts in her old ways, you get to decide how you want to respond and stand up for you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>It takes time to set up the boundaries, yet it can be done.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>You are the owner of your life, and learning to stand strong and speak up for yourself is an important part of living your life.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If you\u2019re ready to say, NO MORE! I want to do this for me! and you\u2019re interested to explore what is possible for you, book a&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/claudiachan.simplybook.me\/v2\/#book\/service\/2\/count\/1\/provider\/1\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">20 min consult<\/a>&nbsp;with me, and see where it can take you.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Recently, I\u2019d been coaching a few people on dealing with their critical or demanding mothers (or in-laws). They are getting fed up and upset because all they wanted is for their moms to change. Wanting their moms to show them acceptance, understanding, love, appreciation\u2026. Here\u2019s what usually happens, their moms: Always find ways to criticize [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":640,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_wp_convertkit_post_meta":{"form":"-1","landing_page":"","tag":"0","restrict_content":"0"},"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-639","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Dealing with critical or demanding mothers\/in-laws - Claudia Chan<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"There are times we wish our moms are more loving, understanding, appreciative. 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